All these been running in my mind for some time.

What is marriage? What is it for? What does it symbolized? !!

To me it is a certificate. A piece of paper that legally pronounce you man and wife in the eyes of the law.

Some people says its a promise that hold 2 person together. But who never ever break one? People always have tons and tons of reasons of doing so. But what is accepted what is not? I don't see any reason can be substantial.

It takes 2 hands to clap. But doesn't mean that the person will clap with another for the rest of the life. 'The Rest of the Life' can be mean 30 years, 40 years, 50 years or more.

These days I see lots of negative side of marriage. Be it an affair, be it a divorce, be it a half time for couples. Things just went off track just like that. So where is the "They lived happily ever after"?

Perhaps I scared the shit out of me. Just think too much.

Perhaps I wanted something or someone to swept me off my feet. You know, that sort of impact that caused you to be sure of your decisions. Like make me sure of the route I going to walk.

I am confuse. Fear consumed me. Its tiring me up.

I told Di the other day. I look forward to living 2 lives together. Having kids etc. But not the cert. I guess that the cert is like a certified-chop-sold thingy. Even you don't change your mind, doesn't mean that the other won't. There is no forever. So why let that cert set the boundary?

I don't know~ really~ confused. Don't want to lose a person I love. But ... Can I aim for 100% ???