"Changes around me making me to lose myself soon..."

I like this nick. really describes me now.

why? coz there are things I encountered now is not what I want, not of what I am expecting. I want more, better. More ideal. BUT what I really want? I duno.

Till now 3 persons had told me similar things: Sit Down Think and Reflect.

yah, I remembered he told me I sound like an old woman, though I only started working during my vacations which was many donkey years back. Guess I am "lao tai po" to him now le lo~~

[A person who hit and run away will have a lot of escaping jobs to do in the future.]
Hit me again. Yah, alot of things I am escaping. ALOT. How much I need to face, I fear to count.

E.M.P.T.Y. is how I felt. coz' I lost the central. what is it? what is the motivation? the drive? coz alot of question marks had appeared. Need to weigh alot of things. need to be balanced. But how balanced it would be?

[Ideal world and Teenager world are both the world that all of us crave for and dying to have.]
this proved that I am old. Both of us are too idealistic. and Naive. Time to wake up. Perhaps I am now shown to the real world.

Perhaps everyday throwing of rubbish, the content is not the same. But the contents are similar. It keeps occuring and occuring, that why you have to keep throwing and throwing and throwing. That why everyday you are back to squre one.

There is a reason why ur friend is trying to show you the truth of friendships. You and Me is similar. People come and stays. But sometimes is not.

Friends have their own life to live. Their life may or may not include you. or sometimes it depends on the timing. Sometimes you wanted them in ur life, but they don't want. Is not always reciprocal. The greatest fear in friendships I guess, is the motives behind it. It may or may not be there. If is not there, is a Congats.

But really want to thank you for staying in my life till now.

Thanks.

This entry I put in down coz' I want to remember of what you had said. Is a way of reminding myself. you do remember, you are a sunshine always.


I also want to thanks all who came into my life and stays till now. Is not easy to do that. coz' most of the time I have nothing to give back. I am sorry. But is really from my heart that I want to thank all.